Tuesday, January 02, 2007

This thing called Love

My mother used to tell me that relationships are whole lot easier in the past.

Boy meets girl. Go on date. Fall in love. Pak-tor for a bit. Get married. Have multiple kids. Grow old together.

She then said that people these days are too fussy about things. The girls always have higher expectations for their men, like lifestyle affordability, cars, chivalry and such. So if one does not satisfy, they will head off to find another. Vice versa.

Well, sometimes I wonder if that is true.

But lately I've been looking around me... and somehow her words are quite prophetic to a certain extent.

Our friends are getting married a lot later in life. Some people are just so unhappy in their relationships but refuse to walk away. Some just keep walking in and out of their partner's life becos they are so unsure about how they feel about the other party. Most married friends are delaying the possibility of trying for kids.

I guess it's a tough one these days. Relationships are always about timing. I term it the sliding doors. Certain things happen for a reason and sometimes it's best to let go if it's not working out.

It really is hard to find someone whom you can accept and know that you can share your life with. It is also necessary that the two of you would have to fit into a lifestyle that you are both comfortable with. And of course, you have to find a partner who can accept you for who you are and what you can bring to the table.

In my case, things have just fallen into place naturally.

We usually get asked how we managed to do all these things without fear or much financial planning.

To that I always tell the hubbi, life did panned itself out for us. We didn't have the most extravagant wedding. It was nice and cosy with our closest friends and family. So we didn't go into debt for that.

Our marriage was just an extension of our relationship. There wasn't big adjustments that we had to make as we were already living together.

Kayden was most definitely a surprise for us but when we found out, we were pretty much happy to welcome him into our lives. The same applies for Baby J. Parenting is not the easiest job for us but we take it with a pinch of salt. Now we've adapted our lifestyle to suit us and our kids.

We are lucky that we dun have to struggle financially at this stage.. but yet we accept that there is only a certain limit that we can spend. We plan for our kids so that they can have a much better life than ours when they grow up.

At times, we do struggle with the lack of our freedom to come and go as and when we want. We had to give up our night activities and concerts. And usually we tend to leave a lot earlier from stuff cos the kids need to go to bed.

Some days are a lil harder than others. And there are sleepless nights too. But I guess it all comes along with kids. At times like this, we have to console each other that it would only get better when they get older.

So at twenty five, I've got married to a wonderful man, have two beautiful kids and a healthy doggie. We might not be the richest people out there but we are definitely blessed with health and a lot of goodwill.

Now all I want is to get my bum back to work and continue my career from where I left off. And of course to find that lovely home that I can live in.

That's my two cents worth of thoughts for the day.

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